Thursday, January 27, 2011

The Land of Arcades

I dearly hope i'm not the only one who's noticed that there are a surprising lack of arcades in America nowadays and that the ones that are there are usually cruddy. Perhaps arcades were at their best in the eighties and nineties, but have hit rock bottom today. Now that there are home consoles, arcades just aren't useful anymore. Perhaps we have Nintendo to blame for that, but I'm not too mad. Arcades wouldn't have survived anyway. The arcade game today are awful, about half of them being photo booths or basketball shootouts. There are a few of the titans like, SPACE INVADERS, MRS. PAC MAN, GALAGA, STREET FIGHTER, and TRON that may still be sighted, but most have been packed away or sold. Pinball machines now dominate as well. I'm very distressed over this and think AMERICA needs more of the good ol' arcades that dotted citys and towns years ago. But my wish may never be granted. At least their are people like the ones who posted the below video who seem to invision my sights.

For those of ou who share my views, I wish we could challenge each other's high scores.

Blandon Iceberg

I guess i'm just writing this because I need to have something to do. It's mainly about this kid named Branden. He's a junior, and our speech teacher's assistant. Every day we jump upon him and force him to the ground. It's very entertaining and if you have a Branden in your school, you should totally attack him too.

Monday, January 24, 2011

Ninjas And Ginjas

Recently I wrote a play for class I entitled "Ninjas and Ginjas." Here it is.

The Ninjas and Ginjas

on upon a time a loooooooong long long long long LONG time ago there was a clan of ninja
The Ninja were great buddies and all loved Oprah. But they hated Samurai. And the samurai they
hated the most was Bonsai Brandon. Bonsai Brandon was a weak but influential Samurai who worked
directly for Lord Dr. Turnipseed. Bonsai Brandon also hated the ninja. Choppy Charles was the leader
of the ninja. He was master of Panda Style. Jackey Chase was the master of monkey style. Also there was Dragon
Drew, master of dragon style. One day the guys were in a heated argument over Chocolate or Vanilla ice cream.
Jacky: I prefer vanilla!
Charles: As do I
Drew: you guys are both totally knuckleheads, chocolate 0wns vanilla all day long!
Jacky: You little-
NEWS: We interrupt your argument to bring you breaking news! The queen of the ginger clan has been
kidnapped by order of Lord Dr. Turnipseed by Bonsai Brandon. This is your 5 o clock unnecisarry story
provoking news, signing out. By the way, she's willing to cough up some major cash if she's rescued!
Jacky: OMG! I had a date with her tonight!
Charles: YOu loser.
Jacky: Shut up. You wish you had a girlfriend.
Drew: Guys! Quit arguing about your worthless lovelives! This is important! We ninja could be rich! If we save her!
Charles: Drew! For once you're right! We should totally go get in the Ninjamobile!
Jacky: hate to kill your thunder, but we don't have a ninjamobile.
Charles: Okay, let's powerwalk there.


Drew: We're here!
Jacky: Now to find and obliterrate bonsai brandon!
Charles: Yeah! Let's walk through these mysterious woods that probobably contains important characters!
Narr: So the ninja explored the wierd important character conataining woods, searching for Bonsai Brandon-
Drew: Hey narrator, be quiet! I just noticed someone!
Jacob: The person you noticed was I, SAMURAI JACOB!
Jacky: You have obvious ego issues
Jacob: duel me, or lose your honor forever!
Drew: Fine then!
Charles: Ninja group 4b7 activate battle plan Q!
The ninja strike a nerdy powery rangers pose and charge Jacob. Jacob grabs charles by the neck and throws him
into jacky. Drew then sneaks up behind him, and rubs his face in his armpit, causing a KO.
Drew: Who needs deoderant! Jacky wake up!
Jacky: Dude! No! I'm obviously knocked out here!
Charles: I'm awake! What should we do with this bozo?
Jacob: buy him sugary sweets!
Charles: Heck no
Jacob: awwww....
Jacky: Wait guys! Look there! I can see the top of a palace!
Charles: Bonsai Brandon's Palace?
Jacky: No! Pizza Palace.
Drew: Cut it out!
Jacob: Who are you guys?
Charles: We ARE Saint James!
Jacob: Wha?
Jacky: No! Were ninja!
Jacob: (Sly Smile) I LOVE Ninja! What are you doin?
Charles: We're trying to find BONSAI BRANDON and rescue the ginger queen from his chubby graps!
Jacob: Wow! Me too! Let's team up!
Narr: So Jacob and the ninja teamed up to find and kill bonsai brandon!


Jacky: This must be the place.
Charles: Bonsai Brandon's Princess Palace!
Jacky: To tell the truth, I would have preferred the pizza palace.
Drew: We all would have.
Jacob: Well, as long as we rescue the Ginger Queen, I'll be happy.
Charles: Agreed. Let's head on in!
The three ninja moved into the creepy castle and find someone sobbing on the floor.
The Ginger Queen!
Jacky: Excuse me miss, you must be the Ginger Queen!
The sobbing lady stands up, revealing herself to be a man to the disgust of the ninja.
Drew: You're not a queen at all!
The GQ: Yeah, well, we have no queen, so I decided to fill in.
Charles: Would it not be easier to be king?
GQ: King? Hadn't thought of that one!
Jacky: So when do we get the reward?
GQ: Oh! Well, you haven't rescued me yet.
Drew: Coolio. Say, why did Lord Dr. Turnipseed kidnao you?
GQ: Oh! He thought I was a REAL queen. Boy was he diapointed.
Charles: I bet. Now come on! Let's get out of here!
Jacky: By the way, our date is cancelled and WE ARE OVER.
QG: Dang,
Narr: And so the ninja, Jacob, and the Ginger Queen thing quested to escape Bonsai Brandon's Palace. But Jacob had another idea.
Jacob: Everyone stop!
Jacky: What's up broski?
Jacob: I'm sorry, but I forgot to mention that i'm secretly a DOUBLE AGENT!
Drew: What do you mean?
Jacob: I mean that I secretly work for Bonsai Brandon! And I'm going to DESTROY YOU!
Charles: Ha! Nice Chance! It's three ninja vs one samurai! You're hopeless!
Jacob: Oh am I?
Bonsai Brandon enters.
Jacky: Bonsai Brandon!
BB: Tha's Right! And now i'm going to kill all you ninja! It was all part of my plan!
Drew: What on Earth?
BB: I secretly conspired to kidnap Ginger Queen because I knew Jacky Chase would exclaim in the middle of a fight over ice cream that you could get rich! Then I sent my nephew Samurai Jacob to lure you to my FAKE palace which is actually a giant bomb that has only one escape pod!
There is a moment of intense silence.
Narr: Dude, even I didn't see that coming.
BB: Yeah, I know.
Charles: Well there's a fat chance that your gonna win now Blagrant Blandon! Wer'e ninja! We can get out of anywhere!
Jacob: OR CAN YOU?
There is an intense battle that takes up the good part of a minuite. At the end, Bradon's on the ground crying and Jacob is in the corner, sucking his thumb. However, Jacob did a real number on Charles who is lying on the ground singing "I'm a little teapot."
Jacky: Give it up Quizzical Quandon, you can't win!
BB:Noooo! My plan was so perfect!
Narr: Or was it?
The narrator pulls out a gun and motions for everyone to get on the ground.
Jacky: Really? The NARRATOR!?
Narr: Yeah, that's right, it's me! No one ever suspects the narrator! I'm gonna get away with the Ginger Queen's Treasure!
The narrator reaches into the GQ'S pocket and pulls out a piece of paper.
Narr: A coupon for half off at Victoria's Secret?! What's wrong with you?!
GQ: A queen has got to play her part, right?
Charles: Listen, we've got to work together and get out of here!
The ninja, samurai, and queen run off towards a door, when The ninja, Jacob, and Narrator get through, they close the door on the Bonsai Brandon and the queen to let them die.
Drew: Smooth moves guys! Too bad we didn't get rich though.
Jacky: I think today we got the riches of friendship.
Brief Pause
All: NAH!

copyright 2011 CPainter Studios\

Sunday, January 23, 2011


My first game review! Some people would have liked me to review something like, COD or Fifa, or Assassin's Creed, but I picked a game I think deserves at leats a cajillion rewards. Super Scribblenauts, a breakthough in gaming. You play as Maxwell, an imaginative chaacter who posseses a magical object, his notepad. In the game, you have to solve puzzles to obtain starites, to win the level. To solve these puzzles, you must think of an object that can help you out, then write it in Maxwell's Notebook. It will then appear, and you can use it! You can even add adjectives, it is incredible! (Or Scribblenautical as my friend Russel would say.) the game itself is for your DS, and will make a great addition! It is one of my favortie games!

Yeah man, it's THAT good.

HERO FACTORY Ultimately Failed

I'm sorry to everyone out there that may find this offensive, but the BIONICLE spinoff, HERO FACTORY failed. Hard. It's not that the intentions were bad, it's just it doesn't work. And here's why. It all started with the end of a great era of toys, BIONICLE. Please check for verification if you don't believe me. LEGO announced it would be making "a new, more flexible platform." in 2010, they obviously lied. HERO Factory was much, MUCH, MUCH less flexible than many of it's predecessors. Although HERO FACTORY stayed true to the original concept of BIONICLE, it was a little bit of a dissapointment. Then in 2011, HERO FACTORY 2.0 was released. It killed everything. HERO FACTORY 2.0 was a "more flexible platform" but it seemed to quash everything BIONICLE stood for. I can't really explain it, but these sets seem to kill my childhood. I just don't understand. I just... can't. I only found ONE BIONICLE part in the whole set. And it had been altered ALOT. It's safe to say BIONICLE lived on within HERO FACTORY, but was obliterated by HERO FACTORY 2.0.